Leta Kathleen's arrival and first week

We have a beautiful little girl! December 7, 2013 Leta made her debut. 

It all started when...

I had been having Braxton hicks and small contractions for the better part of 2 weeks. I was beyond anxious for this little girl to get here. I thought for sure we would have an anniversary or Thanksgiving baby but she was pretty stubborn (I wonder where she gets that from?). I was nesting and working hard to get the house ready and all my Christmas stuff up. I was determined to have it all done before she got here. 

     Friday night Michael and I went to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants with my mom. We definitely ate well :) I even got blueberry cobbler for dessert. I was feeling pretty uncomfortable through dinner but I just figured I ate eat too much. We got into bed at about 9pm as we were both pretty tired. I couldn't sleep and was busy texting and watching old movies when I felt this strange pop. All of a sudden I knew and jumped out of bed so fast so I could save my sheets- My water broke! Mike woke up and asked what was wrong and I told him my water broke and it was happening. 

   I called the doctor and she said we had a little while and I could take a shower etc. I told mike to go back to sleep and I got in the shower and did my hair so I would be pretty for my little one's arrival. I finished cleaning and getting everything ready and it was rather tricky with contractions building pretty quickly. At about midnight I woke Michael up and off we went to have a baby! 

At the hospital...

   We arrived and checked in at the desk. Filling out paperwork while having contractions is interesting- I couldn't remember my birthday :). The nurses kept asking if I was sure my water broke...I'm thinking to my self- " no I did not pee myself, can we get this show on the road". They checked me into triage and yes my water broke and I was 4cm! I was being admitted.
   We moved into our hospital room and my mom came up for moral support. I was hooked up to the monitors and got to see Leta's heartbeat and my contractions. My contractions weren't terrible at first and I was working through them. After about 3 hours I was having really intense contractions and I thought there was  no way I was doing this for 10 more hours (or however long it would be). I was very happy to see the anesthesiaologist at about 4am. He hooked me up and Thry checked me and i was only 5cm :(. I thought I was going to be in labor forever. I decided to get some rest while i could and took a 3 hour nap. When I woke up we realized the epidural worked too well. My lower body was far too numb and my hands and upper torso were going numb as well. It was 7am and they checked me again and I was 10cm! Unfortunately I was way to numb to push yet so they dialed back the epi and we waited for it to wear off. Around 9am I was still super numb but they decided to let me try pushing. I seriously couldn't feel a thing. They could have chopped my legs off and I never would have known. It was very surreal I couldn't believe my baby would be arriving very soon. I pushed for about 30 mins and at 9:44am Leta Kathleen was born :).

  I was so overjoyed to see my baby! I couldn't believe she was here. I held her and looked at my husband and felt all the love in the world. She was so beautiful and all ours.

I got to cuddle with Leta while the doctor fixed me up. Things got a little scary because I had some bleeding but they got it under control after a little bit. They took her from me because I was shaking from all the meds they had to give me. They weighed her in and she was 7lbs 13 oz and 18.75 inches long. They got me all cleaned up and I was able to hold her again after a little while. I wasn't able to move to recovery until the epi wore off. I took about 3 more hours for me to be able to move so I had a nice long cuddle with my baby :).

Recovery....
We were given a very large corner room in the recovery wing. I was happy about this because there was plenty of room to spread out. We had a few visitors the first day. It was mostly family and a few friends. Sunday there was a snow storm and I was so happy to be able to look out the window and see the snow and be with my new baby. The snow also kept the visitors to a minimum which turned out to be very good because we were exhausted and struggling a little with breast feeding. It was certainly harder than I thought I would be and even harder because I kept getting conflicting advice and guidance from all the nurses and lactation consultants. I had a few lessons and we seemed to be getting the feeding down okay by the time it was time to go home.

Home...
We left Monday afternoon :). Our first stop was chick fila...we were starving. We got home and as soon as we got inside I started crying. It wasn't just the 2 of us anymore. We settled in and I honestly don't remember the first night. The next day it got rough. Leta wouldn't latch and I took over an hour to get her to eat and it was so incredibly painful every time I fed her. She was so hungry she just cried and cried. Michael was so supportive and wonderful through everything. I never felt so loved in my life and I definitely needed it. We went for 2 days before we realized that this wasn't okay. We went to see an LC who helped me and Leta get things sorted out. Leta went down to 7lbs 1oz. I was so scared and upset but once we had a few feelings with minimal crying (from both of us) I started to feel much better.

New mom lessons and feelings...
Being a mom is so amazing and different than I thought. It's definitely not all sunshine and rainbows but it is full of such joy. I love her so much it's crazy. I can't sleep at night because I just want to be
sure she's okay and sleep with my hand on her tummy to make certain she's breathing. I love to just look at her. The first night she was awake and wasn't crying was amazing. I got to look at her and sing to her and not be scared. I was reassured that I wasn't doing it wrong and it would be okay. Breast feeding is crazy hard and it's a daily goal to keep going. I wouldn't be able to do it without my husband and family backing me up. On the plus side after 1 week home I am down 25lbs and below my pre-pregnancy weight :). I also have a crazy cute snuggle bunny named Leta!

Week 2 coming soon...

Dear mama Leta

Dear Mama Leta,

It's been seven years since you went to heaven. I hope you get to peak down every so often and check on us. You are going to be a Grandma this Christmas. We are naming our little girl Leta Kathleen. As soon as we found out we were having a girl we knew Leta would be her name. I hope that she has your smile and spunk. I hope she knows that her grandma Leta would have loved her and spoiled her rotten :) 

I wish you were here to see Michael become a daddy and what a wonderful husband he is. I think of you always and miss you. I miss you especially now that I am going to be a mom myself. I will always remember how loving and caring you were to your boys and to me. You taught them to smile and be silly and full of joy. 

I hope you get to look down the day baby Leta comes into the world. Miss you always Mama

• Love Jillian 

Dreaming of Spring

Its February and I want it to be spring. I have already started laying out my garden (On paper) and dreaming up projects to complete. Some of my bulbs have popped their heads out of the ground and I can't wait for them to start blooming. I never used to like spring (I sneeze and am miserable when the trees start budding) but ever since I started gardening spring is almost as good as Christmas! I can't wait to sneeze my way through the first round of flowers :) In the mean time I have taken to indoor gardening and have filled my house with early bulbs and indoor plants.

 Valentines Day Decorations!

Halloween

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays and times of year. I love to decorate for Halloween because the decorations you can find are so cute and I love all the colors. I did a lot more than I did last year...I think I did a display everywhere possible :)

I love these candy corn guys. I ordered them off etsy from a business in Louisiana. They are outdoor wood and come with metal stakes so you can stand them up. I put them down the side of my house with lots of lights for night time. 

Front of the house with Black netting over the rocking chairs and cute signs!

I planted mums and pansies in my whiskey barrel and put mimi pumpkins and a broom in a mesh container. 

I love this felt witch. My mom gave her to me in my first halloween care package :) I added a lighted witch hat and cute standing owl. 

I put garland and purple lights around the door and candy corn lights in the boxwood tree. 

If you look very closely there are glow in the dark eyes in each begonia cluster :) 

Ghosts in the holly tree :)

Witch on the gate to side yard

Giant orange spider on the trellis to the back. I also put purple lights on it for nighttime 

Front of shed

Back yard set up :)

Fall Garden

I wanted to show off my garden craziness from this summer and all the new projects I have been working on.

New Red Emperor Maple Tree...A Birthday Gift from my Hubby :)

I love this tree I hope he is happy in his new home and it is the perfect size once it grows a little to give the front of my house some shade. Also in the pic are my rock owls these guys are so cute!

Side view of front garden.

My favorite spot to sit! I have my mums and I am so excited for fall!!

One of my projects from this summer. I wanted a little Orla Kiely in my garden so I painted a window to put in with my flowers :) 

Fire pit and new seating area. View through new arbor in side yard

This was my big under taking this summer. I added a driveway area off the shed so hubby can have his own parking area. I was also able to add lots more seating and a cute fire pit thanks to my Mom who hooked me up for my birthday! The benches are attached to planters so I can add color and flowers. All of this area used to be "grass" also known as weeds and I gave up fighting in. With the help of family and friends I put down landscape fabric to kill the weeds and 5 TONS of Gravel for my new back yard!! I loved creating this space but my back did not. I am one of those people who want it done right then and if no one is there to help I will do it myself even if I really shouldn't. Case in point I raked most of the gravel myself because I wanted to see how it looked and wanted it done. I hurt my back so badly I could not bend, lift, sit, stand, and basically move for 3 weeks. But it sure looks pretty :)  

New side garden

The flowers in my side garden off the porch went nuts this summer and I managed to save my Lilac bush :) I also added in the pink trellis to grow Clematis next year and as support for my climbing roses. 

My purple shed!

I love this shed. It is one of my favorite things in my garden and is also a conversation point for the neighborhood. Most people love it but there is always some comment about "How does my Husband put up with it". My husband is wonderful and actually picked the color for the shed...I wanted to go darker. He loves what I do in the garden and loves that our house is so colorful and unique. It makes me happy that he likes what I do. It also makes me happy when people in the neighborhood walk by and really appreciate and compliment what I am working on. 

To plant a garden is to believe in Tomorrow

The bottom window was one of the last projects I worked on this summer. With the help of my friend Jessie I got a really cute window. I have terrible handwriting (curse of being a lefty) so Jessie helped me do the lettering. I really like this quote from Audrey Hepburn and I thought it fit in really well with my garden. 

Hope you enjoy the view! Halloween pics coming soon :)

Mama Leta I miss you

Dear Mama Leta,
You went home 6 years ago. I miss you everyday. Michael and I have been married for almost 2 years and hope that you can see joy and love we have for each other. I think of you at the big moments and the small. I think of you when I wear pink...I just bought pink sparkly TOMS that reminded me of you. I am wearing them today. I think of you when we get pizza from Selby's and remember all the picnics and late night talks we had in your bedroom. I thought of you when we got engaged and thought finally I really am going to be your daughter. I thought of you when we bought our house and hoped that you would like it. I thought of you on our wedding day and missed you so much my heart ached. I wanted you to see how happy I was to have your son and wanted you to hold my hand. I think of you when I garden and laugh and imagine you telling me I'm crazy where am I going to put another plant!?. I look around my house while I'm sitting with Michael and just think you would have loved this. I always hear your voice saying..."when do I get grand babies" and shooting me your eye crinkling smile :) I will think of you when we have our first baby and will want you to be with us so badly.  I miss you at the silliest moments and sometimes think I am going to walk upstairs in the old house and see you sleeping. Sometimes I dream about you and we talk just like we used to...those are the best dreams its like you are coming back to visit. You were an amazing light in my life and I will always carry that light with me.
Love,
Jillian

Fall has arrived...

I am so excited that Fall is finally here! I love the weather and all the fun things that come with it. Today was one of those gorgeous perfect fall days...It was warm in the sun but cool in the breeze- just enough for a sweater. When I woke up this morning I really wanted to break out the boots but I told myself not to rush it. I am not coaching cheerleading this year or teaching and it feels a little strange to not be part of school fall activities. I am going to do as much as I can with my friends and family and in my garden. I really want to enjoy this fall and not waste any of these beautiful days.

 I have really big plans for my garden to get it ready for spring! (I know I am thinking way ahead) Fall is bulb planting time and I have tons to plant thanks to my wonderful husband. This will be third spring in this garden and I am finally adding lots of spring color. Over the summer I filled in all my beds and dug a few new ones (I can always find somewhere to put flowers). We also added hardscape in the back in the form of a gravel driveway for the shed and a fire pit seating area (I will post pictures soon) I really love how everything has come together and all the little areas I have to play with. I am really excited to add my bulbs into the mix. I have about 100 tulips to scatter everywhere in purple, red, yellow, and white. I also have lots of different types of daffodils, hyacinths, and crocus for color all spring. Spring used to be my least favorite season mostly because of my allergies (I'm a weird gardener...terrible allergies and I'm afraid of bees!) but now spring is like christmas waiting for all my flowers to bloom.

I am loving all the fall flowers that I have been snapping up, mums, pansies, asters, and ornamental peppers. I jumped the gun in August and bought some mums and they all died because it was so hot! The ones I bought this week are doing great and are filling my garden with pretty colors since many of my summer flowers have gotten over grown or are starting to die now that it's getting cooler at night.

Pictures and more posts to come...Halloween plans and Christmas fun!